


The Continuing Adventures of Tony and his Librarian

by Ytteb



Series: Tony and Celeste [3]
Category: NCIS
Genre: Adventure, Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-05
Updated: 2016-01-08
Packaged: 2018-05-12 00:14:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 15,670
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5646940
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ytteb/pseuds/Ytteb
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>We learn more about Celeste and Tony. The rest of the team come along for the ride at various times.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I thought it would be good to have some stories about Tony and Celeste. Celeste was introduced to the MCRT in 'the force be with you' and met Director Vance in 'Tony tells a story'. I don't think you need to have read those first. All you probably need to know to start with is that Celeste is a librarian.

Special Agent Timothy McGee turned away from the information desk at the library with a rueful smile. Meeting Tony's new girlfriend had reminded him that his library card had expired and so he had come to renew it but so far he hadn't encountered any other brown haired bombshells like Celeste.

Clutching his new card Tim wandered over to the G fiction wondering if there were any Thom E Gemcity novels on the shelves. Even as he did so, he wondered if this was a good idea: he'd be pleased to see his books had been purchased by the library but potentially traumatised by the thought that nobody was borrowing them. As he stood hesitating about what would be best for his self-esteem, he heard his name being called,

"Agent McGee, isn't it?"

McGee spun round, he recognised that melodic voice.

"Um, yes, it's me, McGee," inwardly he cursed at his accidental rhyming, "Good morning, Celeste."

Celeste smiled warmly and then looked round anxiously,

"You're not going to tell me there's criminal activity going on, are you?" she asked.

McGee winced. The story of Director Vance's misunderstanding about Tony DiNozzo's new found interest in reading to children had spread like wildfire round the Navy Yard. McGee thought he would probably have taken two weeks' vacation if he had been in the Director's shoes but the Director was made of stern stuff and was possessed of a fearsome glare; and of course he had the power to transfer agents to less than desirable postings. So the Director had been able to stick it out.

"No," said McGee, "no criminal activity," and then, because he was scrupulously accurate, he added, "well, there probably is but none that I know anything about."

Celeste didn't look completely reassured.

"But I'm sure, well, reasonably sure, that nothing's going to happen. But, obviously, I can't guarantee that. But if it does, and I'm here, I'll do my best to keep everyone safe. And if I'm not here, and something happens, then I'm sure that Metro PD will respond quickly. But I'm sure everything will be fine … well, as sure as I can …"

Celeste's lips twitched for a moment or two but then she said with slightly false confidence,

"That's good to know, Agent McGee. I think."

"Please call me Tim," said McGee, "if you'd like to, of course. But it doesn't matter if you don't."

"Thank you, Tim, I will," said Celeste.

Tim wondered if his name had ever sounded so wonderful.

"What are you doing here, Tim?" asked Celeste, wondering if Tony's co-worker was going to say anything.

"I came to renew my library card," said McGee, displaying it proudly.

"Great," said Celeste, "but why did you come to this branch? It's not close to the Navy Yard and I thought Tony said you lived on the other side of the city."

"Um, there's a great coffee bar nearby," said McGee and, seeing Celeste's slightly surprised look said, "I didn't think you worked here. I thought you were based at the South East library. And this is the …"

"The North West one," agreed Celeste, "there's a sickness bug going round so they're short staffed here. I'm helping out."

"Oh," said McGee and swallowed a little nervously. He tried to think of something else to say before he let slip that he'd chosen the North West library as he thought it was probably the furthest from the South East library. He still remembered Tony's conversations about 'extreme yoga loving' Celeste and he spent his first meeting in the flesh with Celeste in a permanent state of blush. He had thought he was very unlikely to bump into Celeste in this other library and so had chosen this one in which to renew his card.

Celeste wracked her brains to think what else Tony had told her about Tim and then she realised that he had been heading towards the Gs.

"Oh," she said, "were you looking for your books?"

McGee shuffled uncomfortably, wondering what would be the usual response of an author. While he was still considering this, the librarian came up with a helpful suggestion,

"Would you like me to check how often your books get borrowed?"

"No!" half wailed Tim, with a sudden picture of being told that they were never borrowed and were going to be sold off soon.

"Oh," said Celeste in a disappointed voice, she loved to help, "I'm sure they're popular, you know. You don't have to worry."

Tim peered at her a bit suspiciously, this woman seemed to share Tony's uncanny ability to know what he was thinking. He hoped she didn't share Tony's talent for then using that ability to embarrass him.

Celeste wasn't quite as all seeing as McGee thought but she was empathetic enough to know that she had worried him slightly. She wanted to be nice to Tony's co-workers so she came up with another idea,

"I'm about to go to lunch. Why don't you show me this wonderful coffee bar?"

"What?" squeaked McGee, wondering why his voice seemed to keep going up an octave with Celeste.

"You said there was a great coffee bar," said Celeste, "that that was why you'd come here. I'm new to this part of DC so I don't know where to go for lunch." She thought regretfully of the sandwiches she had packed but decided to sacrifice them for Tim.

"Um, sure," said McGee feeling a sense of panic as he tried desperately to remember if there were any coffee bars nearby.

"Great," said Celeste, "I'll just go grab my purse."

As soon as her back was turned, McGee hastily Googled nearby coffee bars on his cell.

"It's two blocks away," he announced when Celeste returned, "it's about ten minutes' walk."

"Ten minutes?" queried Celeste, "not so near after all?"

"It'll be worth it," said McGee firmly and with his fingers discreetly crossed.

It took them a while to find the café because McGee lost the signal he was discreetly following but Celeste smiled bravely although she was wishing she was wearing sneakers rather than heels.

"This is nice," she said when they were finally sitting outside the café, drinking coffee and eating pastries, "this is one of the reasons I wanted to come to DC."

"To have coffee?" asked McGee.

"No," said Celeste, "to get the DC buzz. All this variety. I've never been to a café selling a fusion of Himalayan and Welsh food."

"Really?" said McGee with an attempt at nonchalance, "um, where were you living before?"

"I worked at the library at M.I.T." replied Celeste.

"You were at M.I.T.?"

"Yes, for four years. And I loved it but I wanted to work in public libraries,” she leaned forward conspiratorially, “Academia wasn't really for me,"

"So you came to DC?"

"Yes, like I said, I wanted the excitement of living in the capital. To be at the centre of things."

"To eat fusion foods," said McGee.

"See," she said delightedly, "I knew you'd understand. Although to be honest I'm not sure I’m all that keen on coffee with yaks' milk."

"Um, I find it helps my dairy intolerance," lied McGee.

"Oh dear," said Celeste, "I didn't know about the dairy intolerance before I ordered that pastry for you. You'd better not eat it, it's got ordinary cream in it," and before Tim could protest, she had snatched the pastry out of his hands. She licked some of the cream off her finger in a lingering way. Tim groaned, "Does the yak milk disagree with you as well?" she asked sympathetically.

As Tim didn't really like the taste of the yaks' milk either he thought it politic to agree.

"I think I'll go get a soya latte instead."

By the time he came back Celeste had eaten all the pastries. Tim smiled and wondered how much food she and Tony got through together but that sent his mind down a dangerous path and so he looked for another topic of conversation,

"Do you know many people in DC?"

"Not really. I know people I work with, and Tony, of course. A friend at M.I.T. tried to set me up with some of his friends in DC but I think they must have thought librarians are a bit geeky so nothing came of that."

McGee coughed as an awful thought crossed his mind but he tried to be polite,

"So, no relatives near?"

"No, but Sam is coming for a visit soon."

"Sam?"

"My twin."

"Oh," said McGee a bit more hopefully, "where does Sam live?"

"New York."

"What does Sam do?"

"Designs computer software."

McGee brightened still more, "When is Sam coming?"

"At the weekend. I'm going to be busy this weekend to start with, I need to work on Saturday and Tony might be working too."

"I'd be happy to show Sam around," said McGee.

"You would?" said Celeste, "that would be so kind. Sam's pretty self-sufficient but I feel guilty about not being there."

"No trouble," said McGee happily, "just give me the details. Er, are you alike?"

"Well, we're not identical twins," said Celeste, "but pretty similar really. Hey, I'd better be getting back. Let me give you my card, then you'll have my contact details."

McGee smiled broadly.

NCISNCIS

"Tony, I bumped into Celeste," said McGee as he entered the squad room.

"You did?" said Tony, "where?"

"At the library."

"But she's at the North West library today? Why did you go all that way?" asked Tony peering intently at Tim. "It can't have been for the coffee bars. There's only a weird Himalayan/Welsh fusion bar there. Although the yaks' milk cappuccino isn't bad."

McGee stared at Tony, once again astonished at his eclectic knowledge of DC's food outlets.

"Or are you going to all the libraries to check out if the Agent McGregor books are being borrowed? And if they are, that they're being treated nicely and filed correctly?" continued Tony.

McGee shook himself at this evidence of why Tony could at times be an astute investigator and then realised that he had something to distract Tony.

"Celeste sent this for you," and he placed a small brown sack on Tony's desk.

Tony peered inside and drew out a bran muffin with yoghurt icing. He smiled and McGee couldn't help but explain,

"She said it would be good for your cholesterol."

Tony often got a bit touchy when people, usually Ducky, suggested he needed to follow a healthier diet but on this occasion a goofy smile came over his face and he touched the icing almost lovingly.

"You usually get mad if anyone suggests you need to watch what you eat," said a surprised McGee.

"Tim," said Tony, even as he took a bite of his cake, "it's been a long time since anyone who wasn't a health care professional worried about what I eat. I'm making the most of it."

Tony quickly demolished the cake and then said, "So, did you enjoy your chat with Celeste?"

"Sure, we had coffee together."

"Really?" drawled Tony.

"Nothing happened," said McGee hastily.

"I know," said Tony promptly.

" _How_ do you know?" asked a slightly miffed McGee.

Tony's lips twitched in a way very like Celeste's had earlier in the day but he managed to say seriously, "Because I know you, McGee."

"What does that mean?" asked McGee stilling feeling a little nettled.

"It means that you're my friend and friends don't do the sort of thing you're thinking about."

"Oh," said an appeased McGee.

"And, besides," said Tony, rather spoiling the effect, "have you  _looked_  in a mirror recently?"

NCISNCIS

That evening McGee remembered to look at the card Celeste had given him. He looked at the name and his heart sank, 'Frances C Jones'. The awful thought he had had earlier in the day had proved to be true. He remembered the email he had received six months before from Chris Mason, a lecturer at M.I.T.:

" _Hey, Tim. A friend of mine is moving to DC next week. She doesn't know anyone there and I wondered if you'd look her up, perhaps show her around. She's going to work in one of the public libraries there. She's a nice girl. Frances Jones. Let me know."_

Alas, Tony had been teasing McGee about his love life (or lack of it) and urging him to be more adventurous.  _And_  Tim had been very busy with work and Webelos so he made an excuse and let Frances come to DC without benefit of a McGee welcome. Now Tim sighed at the thought of what he had let slip through his fingers but then he smiled. There was always Sam, who was a computer software designer. How great to have a girlfriend who understood binary. He wouldn't let this opportunity pass him by.

He picked up the phone and called Celeste.

"Ms Jones' phone," came Tony's voice.

"Tony?"

"The very same. Is that you, McGoo?"

McGee winced and hoped that Celeste wasn't nearby. He was half hoping that she wouldn't hear the mcnicknames; they tended to be contagious.

"Is Celeste there?" he asked.

"Are you trying to make an assignation with my girlfriend?" asked Tony.

"Yes, of course, I am," said McGee thinking that attack was the best form of defence.

"In that case, I will pass you over to her."

"Hello, Tim," came Celeste's voice. Tim took a moment to wonder how her voice could sound even more huskily velvet down the phone. "Hello, are you there, Tim? It's not your dairy intolerance playing up again is it? I'm not sure the yaks' milk is the right thing for you."

"No, I'm fine," declared Tim, "I was just wondering if we could make arrangements about Sam."

"Oh," said Celeste, "of course. There is a change of plan. I don't have to work after all and Tony's not busy either."

"Oh," said Tim in a disappointed voice.

"But I'd love you to meet Sam," hurried on Celeste, "so why don't we all meet up later on?"

"Great," said Tim, wondering how it would be to meet Sam with Tony present but deciding to be brave.

"Tony says there's a Hungarian/Icelandic fusion restaurant in Georgetown. As you like fusion food so much, we thought we could go there. Apparently they do some sort of fish goulash."

"Can't wait," said McGee, determining to stock up on antacids before the weekend as well as having a manicure and haircut.

NCISNCIS

Saturday lunchtime saw Georgetown at its best, the sun was shining, the breeze was gentle and people had smiles on their faces, none as broad as that on the face of Special Agent Timothy McGee as he approached the HungIce Bistro. He spotted Celeste sitting at one of the sidewalk tables, her brow was furrowed as she perused the menu but her face lit up when she saw Tim approach.

"Hi, Tim," she said warmly, "this is so kind of you. Tony and Sam are inside getting some drinks, they'll be out soon. I suggested they get you some still water, in case your stomach is still a bit fragile. You know, fizzy drinks aren't good for delicate digestions."

Tim smiled and wondered if he was going off Celeste a little.

"Thank you," he said, politely if insincerely.

"Tim," said Tony arriving with a tray of drinks, "I got you one of those beers you like."

McGee thought he had never liked Tony so much but Celeste looked a little reproachful at his disregard for Tim's inner workings,

"It'll be fine, honey," said Tony, "Trust me."

Tim took a sip of his beer and wondered what he had done to deserve such a wonderful day. He closed his eyes for a moment to savour the moment.

"Tim," said Celeste happily, "I'd like you to meet Sam."

Tim took another microsecond before opening his eyes to meet his future soul mate.

"It's good to meet you, Tim," came the husky voice of Celeste's twin.

" _So far, so good,_ " thought Tim. Sexy voices run in the family.

Then he opened his eyes to look at Sam. Celeste had been right, they were similar. The same deep, lustrous eyes, the same shiny mid brown hair but Sam was taller than Celeste. And Celeste didn't have a beard … but her twin brother did.

 


	2. Chapter 2

The MCRT was much admired at the Navy Yard but most of the employees were glad they didn't have Special Agent Gibbs as their supervisor. Once a year, however, those same people wished, momentarily, that they were on the MCRT; this was because each Columbus Day Gibbs hosted a cook out in his yard. Perhaps it was his Grizzly Adams persona, his back to basics attitude but Gibbs was the meanest griller in Washington – in a good sense. For one day a year the second B stood for Barbecue.

The team would bring salads, desserts and baked goods but Gibbs supplied the essentials: meat, ice cream and beer. Tony was a particular fan of Columbus Day as he had memories of spectacular celebrations at Ohio State University in Columbus. It had taken a few years but Gibbs had finally got through to Tony that wet tee shirt competitions were  _not_  going to form a part of Columbus Day celebrations in  _his_ yard.

The guest list had expanded over the years and now included Agent Fornell, the Director and his family along with Jimmy and Breena Palmer. This year the list had grown still further to include Celeste and, if he was still in town, her brother Sam.

McGee had managed to get over his disappointment about Sam's beard and had come to like the guy even if he occasionally thought he was a bit too geeky, a bit too prone to explain how he had written a particular program. Tim also suspected that Celeste had guessed that he had thought Sam was Samantha and had allowed him to dream his dream. He had to acquit her of outright lying or deception but he was beginning to think she wasn't completely perfect after all.

Tim was also trying to think of a way of letting her know that he had experienced a miraculous reversal of his supposed dairy intolerance as, once again with a more or less complete straight face, Celeste persisted in sending him dairy free cakes and diet suggestions. It didn't help that Tony had bought into Celeste's misconception with increasing enthusiasm. McGee was beginning to suspect that he would soon have a  _soy_  intolerance.

"Hey, McMoo," Tony greeted Tim when he arrived at Gibbs, "great news. We bought a soy based ice cream for you. They only had vanilla flavour, no rocky road or chocolate chip but your body will thank you for it."

Tim groaned, Gibbs always bought the most delicious creamy ice cream which had clearly never been near a soy bean and now he would be deprived of it.

"And," continued Tony with relish, "Celeste has been doing research into sprinkles. It's a good thing you've been picking them off all this years. Those colours are just so bad for you. She thinks you shouldn't even risk having them on your donuts to start with."

Tim groaned again and Gibbs passing by, delivered a head slap and the words, "Leave him be, DiNozzo!"

Tony grinned and then smiled even more broadly as he caught sight of Celeste's horrified expression. It was the first time she had witnessed Gibbs' version of tough love.

"Not to worry, my dear," said Ducky smoothly gathering her up, "it's just one of Jethro's little ways. Now, would you be kind enough to join me on that bench in the shade over there. My weary bones need a little rest and I hate to sit alone."

Celeste gazed at him and smiled, "Of course, Dr Mallard. I understand. Tony has told me that you barely manage to get through even a two hour working day and you have to sit down for most of that."

Ducky grinned, "Touché, my dear. Yes, for my years I still lead a very active life. Forgive my duplicity, I should have just asked for the pleasure of your company."

Celeste happily put an arm through the one extended by Ducky and they went to sit on the bench. Abby bounded up to them,

"I'm in charge of drinks," she announced, "what can I get you?"

"I would like a cup of tea, Abigail," said Ducky, "I can trust you to make it in the right way."

"Indeed you can, Ducky," said Abby enthusiastically, "I approach it all very scientifically. Would you like tea, as well, Celeste?"

"Does Agent Gibbs have any fruit teas do you think? Or green tea?"

Ducky choked, "I doubt it, my dear. And the tea will only be green if it has gone mouldy."

"I'll find you something," said Abby with determination, "even if I have to invent it."

"Abigail loves a challenge," said Ducky as Abby left on her mission, "but you may need to put on a brave face, my dear, when she comes back."

Abby soon returned with something obviously tea like for Ducky and something rather less identifiable for Celeste but which she accepted with apparent pleasure.

"So, Celeste," said Ducky after taking a refreshing sip of his drink, "what part of the country do you come from? Anthony tells me that you have only recently moved to Washington."

"That's right. I was working at the M.I.T. library but I wanted a change. I wanted to have the excitement of a capital city and I wanted to work in a public library."

"Why?"

"I think public service is important," said Celeste, "I guess that's one of the reasons I was attracted to Tony." She waved to Tony who was the other side of the yard but watching her.

"Indeed," said Ducky, "I also have dedicated my life to public service in one way or another. And I don't regret it for one moment. Why … but no, I want to hear about you. I don't want to bore you with the story of my life."

"I doubt it would be boring, Dr Mallard," said Celeste sincerely.

"Well, you might not say that when you get to know me better," said Ducky meditatively, "some of my co-workers are sometimes a little less than patient about my digressions. But it is one of the delights, and perils, of having a butterfly mind. I just hop from one thing to another and some people find it rather tiresome, I fear."

"I think it is probably a sign of someone with many interests, Dr Mallard," said Celeste taking a sip of her drink and deciding against a second.

"You are very polite, my dear," said Ducky, "but please, unless you prefer not to, do tell me about your life before coming to Washington."

"Are you checking up on me, Dr Mallard? Making sure I'm good enough for Tony?" asked Celeste with a slight smile on her face.

"Perhaps," admitted Ducky, "but I have to admit to an insatiable curiosity about my fellow human beings. So do indulge an elderly man."

"All right," said Celeste, "but it's a bit difficult to say where I come from. I was born in Africa and my parents spent most of their working life there. Sam and I were sent to boarding school in the States and went out for the summer vacations."

"My word," said Ducky, "how exciting."

"Not always so exciting, Doctor. Sam and I missed our parents a lot. Don't get me wrong, it was a good school and we were happy but …"

"I understand," said Ducky, "so you have boarding school in common with Anthony as well as other things."

"Yes, I suppose so," said Celeste and Ducky was surprised to see a look of sadness cross her face. It seemed that Tony had been watching closely and he came over when he saw her expression change.

"Ducky," he said lightly, "do you mind if I steal my girl away. We've been here ages and I haven't got to spend any time with her yet."

"Of course," said Ducky, "I mustn't be selfish. And besides, it smells as if Jethro has reached a critical point in his flame throwing. I must ask him if he has grilled my haggis properly. Do excuse me."

Left alone, Tony sat down by Celeste.

"You OK?" he asked.

"I'm not sure if it's just the meat that's being grilled or me as well," joked Celeste.

"We can leave if you want to," offered Tony.

"Of course not, I'd be surprised if they weren't asking me questions. Besides. I want to give Tim that llama milk cheese!"

"You, my love, are a wicked woman," said Tony, "and one after my own heart."

NCISNCIS

Some hours later, as evening began to draw in, and people began to tire, the atmosphere in the yard grew quieter and more reflective. Gibbs, getting a little twitchy with all the company, withdrew to his basement for a few moments of peace. He was surprised to find Celeste there, gazing at a half made rocker.

"I'm sorry," she said when she saw Gibbs, "I didn't mean to intrude."

"That's OK," said Gibbs, "I just came for some quiet."

"I'll go."

"Didn't say that," said Gibbs, "Stay. If you want."

"I like your house," said Celeste.

"You do?" said Gibbs in a surprised voice, "it's nothing fancy."

"That's why I like it. It's simple but it means something."

"Ducky thought he might have upset you earlier," observed Gibbs.

"No, of course not, he couldn't do that. I'll tell him so later."

"What then?"

"I was talking about my childhood. It made me, well, not unhappy but a bit sad."

"Boarding school?" said Gibbs, "why was that?"

"My parents worked abroad. Africa mostly."

"And they couldn't keep you with them?" asked Gibbs.

"Not really," said Celeste.

"And they couldn't come back to work in the States? At least until you were older?"

"I don't think it occurred to them, Agent Gibbs," said Celeste, "we stayed until we were about ten and then we came back for school." She ran a hand over the rocker seat, "Oh, don't think we were unloved. We were loved, very much. We always knew that."

"So why Africa? Why not come back with you?" asked Gibbs.

"Duty, Agent Gibbs. Mom and Dad were missionaries. They loved us but some things were more important than that. Tony tells me you were a marine. You must understand something of how they felt."

Gibbs nodded, remembering having to walk away from Kelly's tears, wishing he didn't have to but knowing that duty was somehow more important.

"And, even as a child, I understood it too but that didn't stop me wanting to be more important than their duty."

"What was school like?" asked Gibbs.

"Good in lots of ways but there wasn't much money. Well, missionaries aren't known for being millionaires! We always had enough but I spent a lot of time wanting more than enough. When you're alone you can start building your security in possessions, nice things. I still find myself doing that now. Tony understands that too."

"So, why do you like my house? It's not fancy."

"It reminds me of my parents' house. They live in Alaska now. No frills, all basic because they don't need or want anything more than that. And there's something admirable about that, something beautiful in the simplicity, the lack of waste. Your house is like that. That rocker will be lovely. I guess it won't be fancy but it will be wonderful because it will be all that it needs to be and because you'll make it as well as you can."

Gibbs nodded, finding himself oddly moved by this young woman who seemed to understand his house so well.

"I glimpse something good in your house and in my parents' home," said Celeste with a laugh, "but I know I'm not ready for it yet. I hope I will be one day but not yet."

"And Tony?" asked Gibbs, "Does he want that too?"

"Tony," said Celeste, "is probably nearer to it than me. No, don't look so surprised. Think of his apartment. He's got lots of lovely things but they're functional for him. His piano, his movies, his clothes, some books but he hasn't got a lot of peripheral things. He has what he needs and he's not really interested in the rest."

Gibbs considered this, he wasn't sure Celeste was right but he'd mull over it when he was alone.

"And in case you  _are_ deciding whether I'm good enough for Tony," went on Celeste, "you should know that I did go off the rails a bit. Bit of underage drinking, 'borrowing' a car – you know, the classic rebellion stuff."

"But it didn't last?"

"Nope. Duty works for me, too. Sam and I were brought up to care about people. Mom and Dad do it from sheer goodness and love but I sort of learned to do it because it was expected of me. And I can't help but do it too, but not quite so much out of goodness. It's duty, so I do it."

"I think you underrate yourself," said Gibbs, "other people have been brought up with duty but reject it pretty easily. I think there's a reason you stick with it."

"Perhaps," said Celeste, "it would be nice to think so."

"I think it's because you love people, you care about them," came Tony's voice from the top of the stairs, "sorry to eavesdrop," he said, as he came down, "came to look for you and overheard you."

"That's all right," said Celeste, "nothing you haven't heard before. Agent Gibbs' cellar is a very easy place to talk in."

Gibbs looked a bit shocked at this idea but, on reflection, realised that many people had come for conversation over the years.

"So, you see," said Tony, draping an arm round Celeste's shoulder, "we've got lots in common. Although I think I've got the edge on the parental front. Senior wasn't exactly sacrificing me for some nobler purpose so I'm allowed to be more bitter than Celeste."

Celeste wrinkled her nose as she considered this and Gibbs suspected they had had other conversations about one-upmanship in neglect.

"And of course," said Tony, "you've forgotten the most important thing we've got in common."

"What's that?" said Gibbs, willing to play along as he suspected they had both let their guards down enough for the moment.

"Well, look at us, just think how gorgeous our children would be. The world would be a poorer, duller place without the combination of our genes," said Tony.

Celeste punched Tony lightly, "Idiot," she said, "come on. Agent Gibbs wants his basement back and I've got a llama cheese to give to Tim."

 


	3. Chapter 3

Tony, Celeste and Gibbs returned to the barbecue and found out the atmosphere was flagging a little. Abby ran towards them,

"Gibbs, Gibbs! It's time to make the smores, can you light the fire?"

"Sure," said Gibbs, "I'll get the cocoa going as well."

"We should have campfire songs," said Abby.

"McScout will know some," said Tony with an 'innocent' look.

Celeste saw Tim's agonised look and decided to take pity on him,

"Come on, Tim," she said, "I'll help you," Tim's mouth opened and shut a few times but no sound came out. Celeste realised that he needed a bit more than moral support so took a deep breath and starting singing, "I love to go a-wandering, along the mountain track …"

Gibbs' guests looked a bit startled to hear her contralto voice filling the yard but after a few seconds they all joined in and Tim also gained some confidence and was soon taking the lead. He even managed to persuade people to join in the action songs although Gibbs declined to take part. Tony took a few surreptitious pictures on his cell. One never knew when blackmail photos would come in handy and the one he had of Fornell was particularly full of promise.

When the singing paused for the cocoa, Celeste noticed that McGee was sitting on his own and she went up to sit beside him. McGee's welcoming smile faltered a little when he saw that she was carrying a small package.

"Hi, Tim," she said, "those action songs brought back some memories. Thank you."

"Um, good," said McGee nervously, his eyes on the parcel.

"So," said Celeste, "I've been doing some research on dairy intolerance."

Tim suppressed a groan, he wondered how she found the time to go to work with all the time she spent reading about his supposed dietary troubles.

"And," she said fixing him with a stern glance, "it turns out that yak milk is no good for people who are dairy averse,"

"It isn't?"

"No. And it seems a little strange to me that someone who's dairy intolerant wouldn't know that."

"Um," floundered Tim.

"So, I was wondering why you told me you couldn't take dairy."

"Er," stuttered Tim.

"And I bought you a llama cheese," said Celeste sadly.

"Oh, that was nice of you."

"But, of course, you'd know that's no good for you either."

"Well, er …"

"Tim. Are you dairy intolerant?"

"No, I'm not," said Tim, with a sense of relief accompanied by a sense of dread.

"Why did you tell me you were?" said Celeste.

Tim thought back to the series of mini mishaps which had led to his falsehood and blushed,

"I don't think I could explain even if I tried," said Tim finally.

"Oh," said Celeste, and for a moment she gazed at him in a manner reminiscent of Tim's third grade teacher and Tim squirmed a bit. "Well, that's good," she said, "because I was getting a bit bored with all that research. And it means that I don't have to try and enjoy yak milk if we have coffee again."

"You don't mind then?" said Tim hopefully.

"I didn't say that," said Celeste a little bleakly but then she grinned, "Though I did get to steal your cream éclair. I usually have to think of other excuses to take people's food."

"So, is that a llama cheese in the parcel?" said Tim.

"No," said Celeste, "I feel a bit bad about inflicting all that soy on you. So I got you a cream cake, really, really full of lactose." She took it out of the little box and rested it on her hand.

"You're not going to shove it in my face, are you?" said McGee nervously.

"No."

"It's not got superglue in it, has it?" said McGee.

Celeste looked puzzled, "No, why would it?"

"You need to speak to Tony about that," said McGee realising that there were some things that Celeste didn't know about Tony.

"Just take it, Tim," said Tony arriving as he saw Celeste still holding the cake out, "before I do."

Tim snatched it quickly, "Thanks, Celeste," and Celeste knew that he was saying thank you not just for a cream cake but for being let off the hook so easily.

"So, I'm guessing there's been a miracle cure on the dairy intolerance front," said Tony.

McGee didn't answer. He was eating his cream cake with an enjoyment that was almost embarrassing to watch.

"Let's leave him," said Tony, "I think he needs to be alone."

Celeste laughed and got up to join Tony but they were interrupted by Abby arriving with Jimmy, Breena and mugs of cocoa. They all sat down again and while they were all trying to avoid getting chocolate moustaches Abby said,

"I'm dying to know, Celeste. How did you meet Tony?"

"Yes," said Jimmy, "he told us  _lots_  about you, but he hasn't told us how you met."

"I met Tony at the library," said Celeste.

"You mean Tony really does have a library card?" asked McGee.

"Timmy!" said Abby crossly, "Celeste told us about Tony's 'well used' library card the first time we met."

"Although when I saw his card for the first time I didn't know it was so well worn because he'd been using it to lever door locks open," said Celeste with a loving glance towards Tony.

"I did use it to take things out of the library as well," protested Tony.

"DVDs?" asked McGee.

"Sometimes," said Tony in a dignified way, "well, quite often. The library has a great collection of rarer movies. But I did take books out too."

"Books of movies?" asked Abby.

"Sometimes, but not always. Non-fiction too."

"Film locations?" asked Jimmy.

"Occasionally," admitted Tony, "I like to do research."

"I don't think it matters what Tony took out of the library," said Celeste coming to his defence, "the important thing is that he uses the library. I wish more people would."

Tony shot her a grateful look. He realised it was an unusual experience for him to have someone sticking up for him. The team had always come through for him when he had been accused of murder but they weren't so good at the smaller things.

"Go on," said Abby, "You haven't told us what happened when you first met."

"There was someone new on the information desk," said Celeste, "and they didn't know what to do when Tony's library card wouldn't work so they came to ask me."

"Why wouldn't it work?" asked Breena.

"It had snapped in two when I was trying to get a door open," said Tony.

"So I went to the information desk," said Celeste, "and there was Tony …"

"Looking debonair and handsome," sighed Abby happily.

"Actually no," said Celeste, "you told me later you'd run out of clean clothes so you were wearing a really tatty pair of jeans and that weird plaid shirt you like so much."

"Go on, go on," said Abby clapping her hands together.

"So I talked to Tony …"

"And told me off for using my library card inappropriately," put in Tony.

"And gave him a temporary replacement," said Celeste.

"And I went away, suitably chastised," said Tony.

"And  _then,_ " said Celeste, "this little old lady, who wasn't looking where she was going bumped into Tony."

"She dropped her books," said Tony.

"And Tony picked them up for her," sighed Celeste, "so sweetly. It was lovely."

"Aww," breathed Abby and Breena. McGee and Palmer looked askance at them and shrugged their shoulders.

"And then I picked up her purse for her," said Tony reminiscently.

"Ohhh," breathed Breena and Abby again.

"And she hit him over the head with her walking stick," said Celeste.

"What?" said Abby, thinking the mood had changed a little.

"Why?" asked Breena.

"She thought I was stealing it," said Tony, "she was real feisty for her age."

"She got a couple of good whacks in," said Celeste, "but I managed to stop her in the end."

"Celeste rescued me," said Tony with a fond smile on his face, "and insisted on coming to the Emergency Room with me."

"Might as well start as you mean to go on," said Gibbs making one of his sudden appearances.

"So that was why you had that black eye," said McGee remembering Tony coming in after one weekend with a spectacular bruise, "why didn't you tell us?"

"I did," said Tony, "I told you all that I'd been assaulted by a little old lady when I'd gone to renew my library card. For some reason none of you believed me."

Comprehension dawned on the faces of Abby, McGee and Gibbs. They remembered now. They had assumed that Tony had had some sort of embarrassing accident, hadn't wanted to tell them the truth about it and had made up an unlikely tale to cover up. They had been called out to a case almost immediately afterwards so the matter had been dropped.

"I didn't want Tony to be traumatised by a bad experience in the library," said Celeste in a professional voice, "so I took him out for dinner after he'd been checked out by the doctor."

"And the rest is history," said Tony, "and I for one will always be ready to campaign for libraries to stay open. They're wonderful places. Admittedly more exciting than I'd realised, but wonderful all the same."

"So, Breena," said Celeste, realising that she hadn't spoken much to Jimmy's wife, "what do you do?"

"I'm an embalmer," said Breena.

Breena was used to getting mixed responses to this statement but the expression on Celeste's face was not one she had encountered before.

"That's … er … nice," said Celeste, "um, excuse me. I'm just going to go get … something."

And she was gone. Tony, looking a bit startled, followed her.

"What's the matter, sweetheart?" he said, when he caught up with her, "I know working with dead bodies is a bit unusual but you've been all right with Ducky and Jimmy."

"I  _know!_ " wailed Celeste as she buried her face in Tony's chest.

"Darling, what is it?" asked an increasingly concerned Tony, "tell me."

"Haven't you noticed?" asked Celeste shakily.

"Noticed what?" said Tony, beginning to panic a little.

"She's Palmer the Embalmer," said Celeste almost hysterically, "it rhymes!"

She dissolved into helpless laughter and Tony joined her. A few minutes later, Palmer came up to them,

"Er, guys, we thought we'd sing some more songs …"

"OK, Jimmy," said Tony when he'd recovered a bit, "McVoice can lead them."

"McGee's gone to find Gibbs' ice cream," said Jimmy, "said something about not having been able to eat it all day and wanting to make up for lost time."

A little hiccup sounded from the region of Tony's chest where Celeste's face was still buried and then she managed to pull herself together, "Let's go then," and she took Tony by the hand and led him to the fire. There was a space opposite Ducky and this seemed to inspire her. She began to sing, "My Bonnie lies over the ocean, My Bonnie lies over the sea." Unlike before, everyone was happy to let her sing and they just joined in the choruses. There was a collective sigh of contentment when the song ended and then people just sat watching the embers of the fire die down.

NCISNCIS

Tony was surprised to find he got to work before McGee the next day although Gibbs was already at his desk.

"Hey, Boss. Great day at your place yesterday," said Tony.

"Yep. Not so much for McGee," came the reply.

"Why not? I thought he had fun. All those scout songs and not having to be dairy intolerant any more. Looked like he was having a great time."

"Yeah," said Gibbs, "about that. He finished off the ice cream. About two pints of it."

"Oh," said Tony.

"It had melted and then re-froze," said Gibbs.

"Ah," said Tony.

"Ducky thinks that's what did it."

"Did what?"

"Gave him a bout of food poisoning. Just a mild one," said Gibbs, "either food poisoning or …"

"Or what?" said Tony, fearing he knew the answer.

"Or he's developed an intolerance for dairy. Who you phoning?"

"Celeste," said Tony, "she might want to start doing some research again."

 


	4. Chapter 4

McGee was off work for three days, finally managing a somewhat wan return on Friday. Fortunately the diagnosis was food poisoning rather than onset of dairy intolerance but Ducky advised that it would be best to re-introduce milk products gradually so that the McSystem could adjust itself.

Tim found himself with a dilemma. He had experienced the consequences of telling an untruth to Celeste and now he wondered if he should tell her that he had turned down his friend Chris Mason's request to be a friend to 'Frances' on her move to DC. Tim knew he hadn't told her any lies on this occasion but he wondered if there was some sort of karma attached to not being completely honest with her.

When he was well he believed such thoughts had only surfaced at the times when he had been unable to leave the clinical comfort of his bathroom. As a logical, scientific sort of person he couldn't see that there was retribution lurking for not being completely open with Celeste. And, he reasoned, Tony seemed to be disgustingly happy and healthy and as he couldn't believe that Tony was a completely open book with his girlfriend there couldn't be automatic karma if one was less than honest with Celeste.

In any case, Tim couldn't think how to broach the subject or what he hoped the outcome would be. Was part of him hoping that Celeste would breathe a sigh of relief and fall into the arms of the person destined to be her true love? Yes, if Tim was honest, he did nurture a hope that, at some point, Celeste's eyes would be opened and she would turn to him. He couldn't quite work out, however, what the fallout from that would be. He suspected that Tony would be deeply hurt if Celeste ditched him and that hurt would go still deeper if the replacement beau was none other than his co-worker.

On the whole, Tim decided that it would be best to let this particular sleeping dog lie. It may well be that his decision was influenced by awareness that Celeste seemed to take a keen interest in the digestions of those around her. He had experienced some of that when she focussed on his 'dairy intolerance' but Tony was her real interest and he had ended up adopting a much healthier diet since he met Celeste. McGee was all for healthy living but thought he lacked Celeste's enthusiasm. He had to admit, however, that Tony was looking good on it and Ducky had been delighted at the lower cholesterol readings that had come back at his last physical.

As Tim approached his desk on the day of his return to work he spotted a plastic food container waiting there. He looked at it suspiciously, peering through the side to try and see what it was.

"It's Celeste's idea," said Tony, "it's meant to be good for people recovering from … from … well, what you've just had."

"What is it?" asked McGee

"Some boiled potato and some saltine crackers," she reckons it should settle your stomach and other McBits."

"Great," said McGee unenthusiastically although now convinced he had made the right decision about being honest with Celeste. He wasn't sure that union with one of the most beautiful women he had ever met was worth a lifetime of dietary discipline.

"Hey," said Tony in a hurt voice, "Celeste went to a lot of trouble with that."

"It's boiled potatoes and crackers," said McGee, "not exactly cordon bleu cooking." Then he realised that was less than grateful, "sorry," he said, "please tell her I'm very grateful for her cooking for me."

"That's all right," said Tony in a mollified voice, "actually she gave me a whole list of suggestions but boiled potato and saltines were the only things I remembered."

" _You_  made me boiled potato?" asked McGee.

"Oh, that's so cute," said Abby arriving to welcome McGee back.

"Got to get the McBody back in shape," said Tony, "well, in as much shape as it will go. Which may not be much but every little helps."

"Thanks, Tony. I think," said Tim. He opened the food box, "I like my potatoes mashed," he said, "but these are whole."

"Oh, Tim," said Tony, "mashed potato is made with butter and cream. Butter and cream are dairy products. Now, Timmy, tell Uncle Tony … what aren't you allowed to eat yet?"

"Dairy products," said Tim a little sulkily.

"You're welcome," said Tony.

NCISNCIS

Two weeks later McGee's digestion was back to normal and he decided to invite Tony and Celeste out for a meal as a way of thanking Tony for his diligence in providing dull, dairy free food for several days. He booked a table for four expecting that Abby would come too but, at the last minute, she had to cancel as the nuns were one short for their semi-final bowling match against the Silver Springs Sisters of Succour.

Celeste and Tim were sitting at their table in Tim's favourite Georgetown restaurant waiting for Tony to return from taking a phone call from Gibbs who wanted to know who had thrown out his two day old take out.

"So, your stomach is  _completely_  better now, Tim?" asked Celeste solicitously.

"Yes," said Tim firmly before she could make his meal choices for him.

"Because I'm sure they would make you something bland if you wanted."

"Celeste," said Tim, "I don't want to see another boiled potato, saltine or bowl of rice for … well, for a very long time."

"I understand," said Celeste, "but perhaps you could have apple sauce instead."

Tim was about to answer a little crossly when he saw that she had a twinkle in her eye. "No. Thank you," he said, turning somewhat ostentatiously to the deluxe section of the menu where rich and creamy items were listed. Celeste smiled and turned to the serious job of making her selection.

They were both engrossed in the menu so didn't notice someone approach their table until they heard a voice say,

"Tim, Fran! What a coincidence bumping into you."

Celeste looked up with delight as she saw her friend from M.I.T. Tim felt his heart sink as he recognised  _his_  friend from M.I.T.: Chris Mason who had asked him to look out for his friend Frances Jones.

Celeste jumped up and threw her arms round Chris,

"What are you doing here? I thought you weren't coming till next week?"

"Had to bring the trip forward," said Chris, "didn't have time to tell you. I'm staying in Georgetown and I've been to this place before so thought I'd try it again."

"Chris, this is Tim McGee," said Celeste. "Tim, this is Chris Mason, a good friend from Cambridge."

Chris opened his mouth to say something but Celeste swept on, "why don't you join us? We had a table booked for four but our friend had to drop out."

Chris was puzzled by Tim's urgent shake of the head but before he could say anything, Tony returned from talking to Gibbs.

"Tony, this is Chris Mason," said Celeste, "Chris, may I introduce Tony DiNozzo, my …"

"I know that name," said Chris, "you're one of Tim's co-workers aren't you?"

"Chris is going to join us," said Celeste, "it's so nice to see him. You don't mind, do you?"

"Of course not," said Tony politely but trying to work out what was wrong about the dynamics of the table.

"So, Tim," said Chris, "you've been a bit of a dark horse, eh?"

Tim mumbled something incoherent and willed his cell to ring. He didn't want anyone to be murdered but a missing petty officer would be perfect right now. He thought rather bitterly about the number of dinner engagements which had been unwelcomely interrupted by a call from Gibbs; where, he wondered, was the demanding call from El Gruffo when you wanted one?

"Fran told me that she was dating a federal agent," went on Chris blithely, "but she didn't tell me it was you."

"What?" said Tony in alarm.

"What?" said Celeste.

"I'm going to have the Maryland Blue Crab Risotto to start with," Tim announced, "and the Bison Strip Loin to follow. What do you want? We should order quickly before the rush starts."

"Whoa, back up there, McSpeedy," said Tony, "what's this about you dating Celeste?"

"You dog," said Chris with a hint of admiration in his voice, "you're dating  _two_  women?"

"No-oh," said McGee, "if you all choose what you're going to eat, we could select the wine as well. How about a Cabernet Sauvignon, or perhaps a Chardonnay?"

"Why do you think I'm dating Tim?" asked Celeste ignoring McGee's menu suggestions.

"And why do you think Tim's  _cheating_  on Celeste?" asked Tony.

"Well, I think I'm going to go mad and choose dessert now as well," said McGee desperately. Celeste and Tony glared at him and Tony plucked the menu out of his hands, "Um, I think I'm just going to use the bathroom."

Tim got up to go but Tony was quicker than him and put a hand on his shoulder to push him back in his seat. "Later, McRomeo," he said threateningly.

Chris Mason was a quantum physicist and considered to be one of the brightest minds of his generation but he found himself floundering. Finally he fastened on one question, "Who's Celeste?"

"Me," said Celeste a little relieved herself to be able to answer a question.

"I thought your name was Frances," said Chris, faint but pursuing.

"It is," said Celeste, "Celeste is my middle name. I used it when I did some modelling when I was a student. I told Tony and he liked it."

"Not being rude, but why does it matter that Tony liked it?" asked Chris, "You're going out with Tim aren't you?"

"No," said Celeste and Tony together.

"I really need to go to the bathroom," said Tim, "why don't you finish this discussion while I'm gone?"

For answer, Tony put his hand back on Tim's shoulder and pressed down.

"Why would you think I'm dating Tim?" asked Celeste.

"Because I set you up with him," answered Chris.

"You  _did_  date McGee?" asked Tony in a hurt voice.

"No, darling," said Celeste, "the first time I met him was in the Emergency Room after you'd been attacked by Darth Vader."

"Tony was attacked by Darth Vader?" asked Chris.

"And Chewbacca," said Tony, "but that's not important now."

"Wow," said Chris, "Fran, you were right when you said you wanted to come to Washington for some excitement."

"It wasn't really Darth Vader and Chewbacca," said Tim wanting to be accurate, "it was two crooks that Tony ran into at a Sci-Fi convention."

"Oh, you like Sci-Fi, do you?" asked Chris, "I think there's a convention at the weekend. Perhaps we could go together?"

Tony glared at him, "so explain again what you meant about setting Celeste up with McGeek?"

"His name's McGee," said Chris helpfully.

"Tony likes to give me nicknames," explained Tim.

"Oh," said Chris enthusiastically, "have you told him your M.I.T. one?"

Celeste thought that Tony looked distracted enough to follow this up so hastened to say, "Yes, Chris, what did you mean about setting me up with Tim?"

"You remember, Fran. I told you that I'd contact a friend in Washington who might be able to look you up, help you out when you moved."

"I never heard from him," said Celeste.

"That was Tim," said Chris, "he said he was too busy and, reading between the lines, I got the impression that he wanted to find someone a bit more exciting than a …"

"Librarian," said Tony, "Oh, Timmy."

"So when I saw you with Tim here tonight," said Chris, proving why he was such a good deductive scientist, "I assumed he'd changed his mind and that you'd got together after all."

"Oh, Timmy," said Tony, now beginning to enjoy himself, "did you do the thing you shouldn't do? Did you judge a book by its cover?"

"No," said Tim defensively, "I never saw Celeste, I mean Frances, er Fran. I never saw her cover."

"But you thought librarians were boring," said Celeste sadly, "you assumed I'd be dull. Doesn't Agent Gibbs have a rule about that?"

"A rule about assuming librarians are dull?" asked Chris, "gosh, those are some pretty specific rules."

"No," said Tony, "it's 'never assume'.

"I really was busy, Celeste," said Tim.

"I understand, Tim," she said.

"And Tony was getting at me to be more adventurous in dating," added McGee a little unwisely.

"So you're saying it's Tony's fault?" asked Celeste indignantly.

"No-o-o," said Tim a little unconvincingly, "and I really am sorry."

"OK," said Celeste, "apology accepted. After all, it all worked out for the best," and she smiled at Tony and linked her arm though is.

McGee braced himself for more digs from Tony but none came and he looked at him in surprise. He saw a look of compassionate understanding in Tony's eyes and realised that Tony knew that he hadn't been  _apologising_  to Celeste but had been expressing his regret at not meeting her first. Tony wasn't always known for his kindness but he didn't want to kick a man when he was down and he was grateful that Tim had turned down the opportunity to meet Tony's librarian.

Tony wasn't above taking advantage of the situation, however, and this meal  _was_  meant to be a thank you for providing plain nutritious food so he picked up his menu and said,

"Hmmm, I think I'll have Truffled Risotto Fritters to start with, Sautéed Mediterranean Turbot Filet to follow and Champagne sorbet to finish. What about you, sweetheart?"

"Well," she said thoughtfully, "I was going to have a garden salad with grilled fish but that seems rather  _boring_  and I don't want to live up to Tim's image of librarians, so I think I'll have the same as you but perhaps I'll have lobster instead of turbot."

"Sound delicious, doesn't it, McGourmet?"

"Yes," said McGee bravely.

"You did say this was your treat, didn't you, Tim?" said Celeste.

"Yes," said McGee despondently. He thought it was just as well his digestion had recovered because his wallet was about to take a beating.

"Excellent," said Tony, "shall we look at the wine list?"

 


	5. Chapter 5

Tony limped into the squad room and sighed with relief when he made it to his desk. He lowered himself gingerly into his chair and breathed out happily.

"Morning, Tony," said Tim, looking up briefly from picking the sprinkles off his donut. He took a second look when he saw the look of pain on Tony's face, "what you been up to?"

"You don't usually want to know what Celeste and I have  _been up to_ ", said Tony.

"You're right," said McGee hastily, "I probably don't want to know."

"But as you've expressed an interest," said Tony, "I'll tell you."

Tim started reciting the periodic table in his head to try and distract himself but it didn't work, he couldn't help but hear Tony say,

"We did some  _extreme yoga_ , last night."

"Ewww," said Tim, "I told you I didn't want to know."

"Wash your mind out with soap, McPerv," said Tony in mock disapproving voice, "my lovely, supple, athletic …"

McGee found he had got to ununoctium at the end of the periodic table without knowing how he had got there so he began again with hydrogen.

"… girlfriend," continued Tony blissfully unaware of his co-worker's inner thoughts, "has started teaching a yoga class in her building. And I went along to give her moral support."

"Calcium, scandium …" said McGee, "wait, you  _actually_  did yoga? Not the other thing?"

"Were you reciting the periodic table McScientist?" said Tony.

"No … yes," admitted Tim, "hey, if Celeste has only just started teaching the class how come it was extreme already?"

"Ah, well," said Tony a little sheepishly, "although my athletic prowess is legendary, it seems that over the years my suppleness has … diminished somewhat. So what was entry level for Celeste was extreme for me and I may have pulled something while trying to perfect my Fish Pose. Hey, I'm impressed, you only got to scandium this time."

McGee forbore to tell him that he'd already been through the table once before and had hit scandium for the second time. He went back to picking off sprinkles but his new found tranquillity was disturbed when Tony said, in a somewhat smug voice,

"But Celeste has promised to give me a  _massage_  tonight to ease the pain. She has very  _clever_  hands."

" _Hydrogen, lithium …_ " began Tim again under his breath.

Gibbs arrived shortly afterwards and distracted his team with actual work. At lunch time Tony, who seemed to have recovered from his muscle strain, cornered Tim in the break room.

"So," he began, "Celeste is thinking of starting up a chess club at the library."

McGee wondered how Tony's girlfriend found the time and the energy to throw herself into so many things but thought Tony was just making conversation.

"And I told her that you'd been to chess camp," continued Tony, "and she wondered if you'd like to help?"

McGee's immediate thoughts were mixed. Pleasure at the thought of doing something with Celeste and  _horror_  at the thought of doing something with her. So far, nearly all his interactions with her had led to some sort of disaster; he had been wondering if she was cursed and he had been thinking of asking Abby if she had done a Tarot reading for her.

"Well?" said Tony impatiently as Tim seemed to have fallen into a reverie, "what do you think?"

"What would it involve?" asked Tim cautiously.

"Not sure. A bit of tutoring, a bit of mentoring. Some advice for the person leading the group."

"So Celeste isn't going to be in charge?" said Tim a bit more cheerfully.

If Tony noticed Tim's slightly odd reaction, he didn't mention it, "No. She thought it would be a good idea but she doesn't know her rook from her castle."

"They're the same thing," pointed out McGee.

"Which just goes to show," said Tony, "that she's not the person to lead the group. No, there's a girl on the staff, Millie, Minnie, Tillie … something like that, who's really keen. Something like a grand master but she can't do it on her own."

"I suppose I could think about it," said Tim.

"Celeste thought you and Millie, Minnie, Tillie might hit it off," said Tony, "she's single, likes chess and has got a tee shirt with '11 cheers for binary' on it."

Tim brightened still further; he had that tee shirt as well but didn't know anyone else who would appreciate it. After all, Celeste was good at heart; it was just that up to now she had been the butterfly which caused hurricanes in his life.

"OK," Tim said, throwing caution to the wind, "I'll do it."

"Great," said Tony, "do me a favour and bring my coffee back with you. That muscle strain seems to have come back. Thanks."

NCISNCIS

A week later, Tim entered the South East library where he was going to meet Celeste to be introduced to Millie, Minnie, Tillie – he still wasn't sure which. As soon as he went through the door the heavens opened and rain came teeming down outside, Tim shivered; surely it wasn't an omen?

He approached the information desk and asked to speak to Ms Jones. The young man on the desk was apologetic,

"I'm sorry, Ms Jones was called away to an emergency budget meeting. She should be back later. Do you want to wait or can someone else help?"

"We were going to meet Millie, Minnie, Tillie … something like that. About a new group being set up in the library," said Tim.

"Oh," said the helpful young man, "that's probably Tillie Armstrong. I'll go tell her you're here."

Tim looked at the noticeboard while he waited. The library was certainly a hub of the community with a breath-taking range of activities available. At the sound of a cough behind him, Tim turned to see the helpful young man standing there with Tillie.

"Morning," she said brusquely, "Frances said she was looking for someone to help with my group. I didn't know she'd found anyone."

"Yes," said Tim, "she found me." McGee wasn't sure that he was glad that he had been found. Tillie was a few years older than him and McGee didn't really go for older women, he found women his own age intimidating enough. She was striking, however, dirty blonde hair, brown eyes and tall.

"Frances' office is empty," said Tillie, "we can talk in there."

Tim trailed meekly after her and the helpful young man went back happily to his information desk.

"So," said Tillie when they reached the office, "it's good of you to want to help with the group."

"I think it's important to get involved with local groups," said Tim.

"Are you involved with other groups?" asked Tillie.

"I help run a scout troop," said Tim, "although I don't have as much time for it as I would like."

"Good," said Tillie, "it's good for young people to learn the truth behind society's façade."

"Y-e-s," said McGee uncertainly and glad that he had obeyed his federal agent training and sat with unimpeded access to the door. "How often do you think the group will run?"

"Once a month to start with," said Tillie, "I'm not expecting a huge take up to start with so we'll start slow. What time would suit you?"

"It's difficult for me to commit to a fixed time," said McGee, "I'm a federal agent you know, so I may be called in to work unexpectedly. Obviously I'd try to let you know if I couldn't make it."

"I didn't realise you're a federal agent," said Tilly, "that makes it even more impressive that you're willing to help. It makes me realise that I'm in danger of being influenced by society's stereotypes, I should know better. I would have expected someone in your position to be obsessed by hierarchies, structures and tradition but clearly you're not. You're like a breath of fresh air."

"Oh," said Tim in a pleased but puzzled voice and thinking that Tillie was really quite attractive when she was animated. "Good. Perhaps we could discuss the group over dinner one night?"

"We could," considered Tillie, "but evenings aren't always good for me. I've got two teenage children to get child care for. They're just a bit young to leave on their own."

"Oh," said Tim, beginning once more to doubt Celeste's judgement. He had been flattered, however, by Tillie's view of him as remarkable and stereotype bashing so he persisted, "we could meet at lunchtime, perhaps?" He tried to probe a bit more, "I'm guessing that your children's father is not around?"

"No," said Tillie fiercely, "that's one of the things which led me to want to set this group up."

"Oh," said Tim in an understanding voice, "your children will come to the group?"

"That's an interesting thought," said Tillie, "you see, you're still challenging my preconceptions. I, in my blinkered way, had thought this wouldn't be right for children. I hadn't realised how much I'm a product of my upbringing, my indoctrination."

"Um," said Tim deciding not to pursue all of this, "I think this would be a great group for children. There's a school of thought that says even toddlers can benefit."

"Toddlers? I would never have thought of that but you're absolutely right, it is never too early to start leading them into more rigorous ways of thinking, to encourage them into independent thought."

"Yes," said Tim, "absolutely. So, I hear you're something of a Grand Master?"

Tillie looked surprised, "that's a rather patriarchal way of looking at things isn't it?"

"I suppose it is," said Tim, "but Grand Mistress doesn't sound quite right."

"Perhaps you're not so immune to society's stereotypes after all," said Tillie with a hint of disapproval.

"Er, we'll have to find another title," said McGee.

"If you think it's important," said Tillie.

"Don't you?" asked McGee, "If I'd reached your level of accomplishment I'd want some way for that to be acknowledged. In a non-sexist, non-patriarchal, inclusive way, of course."

Tillie opened her mouth to respond but at that moment the door flew open and Celeste burst in.

"Oh, I'm sorry I'm late." She said as she shook the rain off her hair.

"No problem," said Tillie, "Timothy and I were discussing how he could help with the group. He's got lots of interesting ideas."

"He has?" said Celeste.

"Yes," said Tim, "it turns out that I don't conform to the stereotype of a federal agent, that I don't make assumptions."

Celeste's lips twitched but she then proved why she had become an assistant head librarian,

"Tillie's group is going to be called 'Women against Men'," she said.

"WAM for short," said Tillie thumping a fist into her hand.

"And while I know you're very interested in the subject," went on Celeste smoothly, "I think you were right when you said earlier to me that you didn't think you'd have enough time to devote to it."

"Er …" floundered Tim.

"Because it's too important a subject to be treated anything less than wholeheartedly," prompted Celeste.

"That's right," said Tim recovering, "although I'm having second thoughts about whether it would be right to bring toddlers along. It might be better not to dilute your efforts, at least to begin with."

"I expect you're right," said Tillie in a disappointed voice, "but thank you for considering helping. You've opened my eyes to how even I think in the way I have been programmed to, I'm going to have to give this some serious thought. Let me know if you change your mind and feel able to get involved after all."

"I will," said Tim, crossing his fingers.

"I'd better be getting back to work," said Tillie, "it was nice meeting you. I'm sorry I wasn't able to take you up on your offer of dinner."

Tim glared at Celeste as Tillie left the room, "I suppose Tony got you to set me up?" he said angrily.

"No. No, Tim, I wouldn't do that," said Celeste, "I got called away. I told Millie you were coming, she was waiting for you."

"She was," said Tim bitterly.

"That was Tillie, not Millie," said Celeste.

"What?"

"Millie Ames is who I wanted you to meet," said Celeste. "I wouldn't have put you in the same room as Tillie. She's just gone through a very unpleasant divorce and has sworn off men completely. In fact she's just announced that she's considering entering a life partnership with Susan. I told her I'd look for someone to help her start her group but, to be honest, I can't think of anyone. Most of the men in the library are terrified of her. I'm impressed that she seemed to like you, Tim. If you change your mind about her group?"

"No, I don't think so," said Tim.

"So," said Celeste, "do you still want to meet Millie?"

"Yes," said McGee, "why not. Oh, did Tony get in touch with you?"

"Yes," said Celeste, "I was about to call you to say I'd be late for our meeting when he called. By the time we'd finished I had to go into the meeting so I couldn't let you know. I'm really sorry, Tim."

"That's all right," said Tim, relieved that the butterfly effect hadn't been at work after all. "It was short notice that he was called to go out to the USS Calvin Coolidge. He asked me to let you know in case he couldn't get through. Reception's not always good on choppers."

"I hope he'll be all right," said Celeste, "the weather's awful out there."

"He'll be fine," said McGee. "Um, do you think I could meet Millie? I've got to get back to work soon."

"Of course, I'll go get her," said Celeste.

NCISNCIS

Half an hour later, McGee was a happy man with his trust in Celeste restored. Millie Ames was not as stunningly beautiful as Celeste, probably didn't practise extreme yoga and, sadly, was not wearing her binary tee shirt. She was, however, much less alarming than Tillie (or Celeste), was quite attractive, was mathematically minded, kind and wore a tee shirt which read, "Knowledge is power. Ask your librarian." It may just have been reaction to his encounter with Tillie but Tim liked Millie immediately and they had agreed to meet over dinner to discuss the plans.

Tim walked in something of a dream towards the exit and noticed that the wind had increased and the rain was still pouring down. Celeste called out to him before he got to the door,

"So, how did it go with Millie?" she asked.

"Fine,

"Good," said Tim.

"So, am I forgiven?" asked Celeste.

Tim's cell rang before he could answer. He grimaced when he saw that it was Gibbs. He held up a finger to show Celeste he had to answer and she nodded in understanding. As she watched, she saw Tim's face lose colour,

"Yes, Boss … yes, Boss. I understand. Yes, I'm on my way back. Yes, I'm with her now. OK."

He ended the call and Celeste said,

"Tim, what is it? You look awful."

"Er … that was Gibbs. He … um … he had a call. It seems that … they lost contact with … um the chopper Tony was on … they haven't heard from it. It looks as if it may have gone down somewhere. It may have crashed in the storm."

 


	6. Chapter 6

Celeste was never able to give a coherent account of the forty eight hours following the news of the loss of Tony's helicopter. All she had was a series of impressions, mental snapshots of who she was with and what they said and did. There was a roller coaster of bad, good and then bad news again.

The first bad news was that Tony's helicopter had disappeared on its way out to the Calvin Coolidge in the North Atlantic. It was thought that it had been caught in the sudden storm and had had to ditch in the sea. The better news, relayed by McGee later that day, was that the signal from the aircraft's emergency beacon locator had been picked up. The bad news, which Celeste was given when she went to the Navy Yard later in the day, was that the storm was still going strong and with the light fading and visibility poor, the search by air had been called off until the morning.

After an hour or so of sitting in the squad room, Gibbs announced,

"No point staying here. I'm going home. They'll call us if there's any news."

"Quite right, Jethro," said Ducky stoically, "better to get some rest and be ready for what the morning brings. Come along, Mr Palmer."

"I'll just go and say goodnight to my guys and give them an update," said Abby, "And let Bert know that I'm leaving."

"Can I give you a ride, Celeste?" asked McGee, knowing that she had taken a cab to the Navy Yard.

"Thanks, Tim," said Celeste feeling a little puzzled. She knew that going home was the sensible thing to do but she hadn't quite expected the MCRT to do it. A few minutes later, seated in McGee's car, she realised her mistake.

"Um, this isn't the way to my apartment, Tim," she said, "or yours."

"No," agreed Tim, "we're all going to Gibbs' place."

"Oh," said Celeste, wondering how they all knew that was where they were going.

It felt odd to Celeste to be at Gibbs' house without Tony there. They all sat in Gibbs' sitting room, drinking coffee and eating takeout which had been ordered without Celeste noticing. The conversation was a bit stilted and the takeout mostly went cold but they each found comfort in not being alone as they listened to the wind and rain beating against the windows. As Celeste finally dozed off, her last impression was of the comforting glow coming from the open fire and of Gibbs watching over them all.

NCISNCIS

Celeste went to work the next day. She found that working kept her mind occupied a little and stopped her thoughts from going round and round in the same relentless circle of despair. Being busy gave her moments of forgetfulness but as soon as she stopped, the dread and fear came rushing back in once more.

Gibbs arrived at lunch time. He saw her eyes widen in sudden worry and he hastened to say,

"The weather's improved out there and they've got planes going out to the beacon's location."

"Thank you, Agent Gibbs," said Celeste, "you could have phoned. You didn't have to come all this way to tell me that."

"No problem," said Gibbs, "I can't do anything at the office and they'll let me know if anything comes up. And I remembered that Tony sometimes goes to lunch about now and slips out to eat with you. I thought we could go and eat."

"I'm not really hungry, Agent Gibbs," said Celeste.

"Nor me but Ducky keeps telling us all to eat so why don't we do one another a favour and go out and not eat together?"

Celeste managed a shaky laugh, "OK. There's a Brazilian place round the corner that Tony likes, they make great coffee."

"Sounds good," agreed Gibbs, "although Tim said there was some sort of Welsh/Himalayan place he went to with you."

"That was when I was helping out at another branch," said Celeste, "I'm surprised Tim told you about that. It was the start of his dairy intolerance phase."

Gibbs and Celeste went to the Sugar Loaf Café where they had  _Bauru_ , a traditional Brazilian sandwich and coffee in varying degrees of strength. Gibbs could see why Tony liked the place; apart from interesting food it was decorated with stills from movies of the 1950s and 60s.

"I wonder if Tony is boring the crew of the helicopter with movie quotes," said Celeste as she picked at the crust of her sandwich.

"Do you like movies?" asked Gibbs.

"Not as much as Tony."

"I don't think anyone likes movies as much as Tony," said Gibbs, "I bet he knows a movie with a plot like this."

"I hope it's one with a happy ending," said Celeste, "sorry, Agent Gibbs, I keep thinking about him being out there, lost and cold. And then I can't help but think of him  _not_  being out there …"

"Tony's a survivor," said Gibbs firmly, "don't give up on him yet."

"Is that a rule?"

"More like a way of life," said Gibbs ruefully.

"You know," said Celeste, "until I met Tony I'd  _never_  been to an Emergency Room. That soon stopped!"

They continued to eat and drink for a few more minutes and then Celeste looked at her watch and said, "I need to get back."

Gibbs agreed and he walked her back to the library. At the library steps she handed him a cardboard box,

"I got these when you went to the bathroom. Although I suppose I should call it 'head' now. Take them back for the others."

"What are they?" asked Gibbs.

" _Bolinho de chuva,_ Brazilian donuts. Tim will like them even if they haven't got sprinkles."

"I'll tell him," said Gibbs, "come to the Navy Yard when you finish work. If Tony hasn't turned up we'll probably head back to my place again. So come, if you think it will help."

"Thank you," said Celeste, "I will."

She went back and finished an odd day's work. She spent some time putting returned books back on the shelves thinking that would be a useful thing to do. It was only later that she realised that Millie and Tillie were patiently going round after her and putting the returned books on the  _right_ shelves; in her distraction she seemed to have invented a new version of the alphabet. Celeste finally called it a day when she found herself in tears listening to story time and remembering the times when Tony had led it on Saturdays.

A suspiciously red-eyed Abby greeted her with a hug when she got to the Navy Yard.

"They found the helo," said Gibbs.

"And?" asked Celeste.

"It had sunk," said Gibbs, "they managed to send divers down and it was empty."

"That's good, isn't it?" said Celeste as she struggled to keep her composure.

"Yes," said Abby firmly, "it is. Because it means that they got out alive." She looked round defiantly as if daring anyone to contradict her.

"The life raft was gone," said Tim, "so it's possible …"

"Probable," corrected Abby.

"…er, probable, that Tony and the crew got into it."

"How do they find the life raft?" asked Celeste.

"It should have a beacon of its own," said Gibbs, "they'll start looking for it when it gets light."

"Another night at sea," said Celeste.

"Anthony's very resilient," said Ducky encouragingly.

"And the crew of the helicopter is highly trained," said Jimmy, "They'll look after him."

Celeste looked round at Tony's co-workers and, for the moment at least, decided she loved all of them.

"And Tony's always going missing," said Jimmy.

"Yes," said Abby eagerly, "there was the time he got lost in the sewers with that marine."

"And then he was chained to that serial killer," said McGee thoughtfully.

"And locked in that shipping container," said Ducky reflectively, "Anthony does find lots of interesting ways to get into trouble."

Celeste's feeling of love for the MCRT did a rapid retreat in the face of these gloomy anecdotes. Surprisingly, it was Gibbs who picked up on this,

"He's always come back," he said, "always."

Celeste put on a brave smile and tried not to think that, if Tony was a cat, how many of his nine lives had been used up.

"Come on," Gibbs said, "let's head out."

They followed the same pattern as the previous night but at least at this time they didn't have to ignore the sound of wind and rain; the storm had blown itself out and all was calm.

The phone call came just after 0200 and Gibbs answered it on the first ring. Everyone else woke up immediately and waited to hear the news. McGee hoped it  _was_  news and not dispatch forgetting they weren't on call and wanting to send them off to Rock Creek Park.

"They found the life raft," said Gibbs as he ended the call, "luck was with them. A destroyer heard their signal and went to pick them up."

"Are they all right?" said Abby.

"No details yet," said Gibbs, "but they're flying them back to Walter Reed. Should be there in a few hours."

"Them?" asked Ducky, "who is 'them'? Do we know?"

"They picked up four survivors, Duck. Three crew members and a passenger. As far as we know DiNozzo was the only passenger. Where you going, Abs?"

"To the hospital," said Abby, "and I need to buy balloons on the way."

"I'd hold off on the balloons for the moment, Abby," said Gibbs, "Let's wait until we know what we're dealing with."

"But we can go to the hospital?" said Abby.

"Sure," said Gibbs, "but they might not know what hit them." He briefly put an arm round Celeste and whispered, "Told you he's a survivor, let's go see him."

NCISNCIS

The MCRT and Celeste occupied one of the hospital's waiting rooms for several hours as they waited for Tony and the helicopter crew to be brought there. Gibbs told the others what Celeste had said about having never visited an emergency room before meeting Tony. That seemed to open a floodgate of memories,

"There was the time his nose was broken by that marine who went berserk on steroids," remembered Tim with a wince.

"When he broke his arm," remembered Jimmy.

"When his face got beaten up when he was posing as an assassin," said Abby.

"And he should have gone when he ran the car into that fire hydrant," said Ducky, "and indeed I've had to patch him up far too many times in autopsy."

Celeste was horrified to hear of all Tony's escapades but finally realised that his co-workers were exaggerating his accident proneness when Abby said,

"And don't forget when he had the plague."

"Bubonic or pneumonic?" asked Celeste drily.

"Pneumonic," said Abby, "bubonic wouldn't have been nearly so bad."

Celeste smiled. She'd thought that Tim was the one with the vivid imagination but now she realised that the whole team had their share. Gibbs nodded approvingly recognising that Celeste was made of firm stuff if she wasn't fazed by learning that Tony had survived being infected by a disease from the Middle Ages.

After a couple of hours, with no end to the wait in sight, Gibbs and Celeste went to buy drinks and snacks from the cafeteria. With their vigil about to end it seemed that appetites had returned and the rest of the team looked up eagerly when Gibbs and Celeste returned. Gibbs handed out the drinks and Celeste looked through the bags of cakes they'd brought.

"I got you a donut, Tim," said Celeste, "but I don't think you should eat it."

Tim decided to assert himself at last, "You know, Celeste, I think it's really great that you take such an interest in what people eat but …"

"I know," said Celeste mournfully, "I try not to do it but I think it's in my genes. My mom is worse than I am. When Tony came with me to meet my parents, it nearly drove him mad. In the end he and Dad went into the den and tucked into Dad's secret fudge store."

"Tony's been to see your folks?" said Abby.

"The other weekend," said Celeste, "we flew up to Alaska. I never knew so many movies were made in Alaska."

"And Tony knows all of them," said Jimmy.

"It certainly felt like it," said Celeste.

"And did the meeting go well?" asked Ducky.

"Yes," said Celeste, "but, then, who doesn't like Tony?"

"Oh,  _lots_  of people," said Abby earnestly, and then seeing Celeste's frown, hurried on, "I mean crooks and bad guys and …"

"The women in the Evidence Garage," added Tim.

"And then there's…" began Jimmy.

"Well, my parents  _loved_ him" said Celeste firmly, "and everyone at the library thinks he's wonderful."

"Even Tillie?" asked Tim a little meanly.

"Even Tillie," said Celeste, "she said that if she'd met Tony before she hooked up with Susan she might not be a founding member of WAM."

"All right," said Tim hungrily, "Tony is the most popular guy in DC. Now can I have that donut you got me?"

"I really don't think you should have it, Tim, it won't be good for you." said Celeste.

"Celeste. You've just admitted that it's a bad habit monitoring what people eat. Take the first step towards a cure … let me have my donut."

"But …" said Celeste trying once more to dissuade Tim.

Tim grabbed the bag and took out the donut. "Hmmm," he said, "it looks delicious, and it's got chocolate sprinkles. My favourite." He raised it to his lips.

Gibbs coughed, "Celeste was trying to tell you. I dropped the bag. Those 'chocolate' sprinkles are from where it landed in a pile of trash; it was plain before."

Tim pulled the donut away from his mouth, "Thanks, Boss. And thanks, Celeste. Sorry."

"Always trust your librarian, Tim," she said solemnly, "here, you can have half of mine."

An hour later the news came that the helicopter carrying the crew and Tony had landed. Four gurneys were soon wheeled into cubicles so that the patients could be examined. The doctors allowed Ducky and Jimmy to go and help but the others had to wait more or less patiently. After half an hour, Ducky returned.

"Good news," he said, "they are all a battered, bruised and shaken up but, all things considered, they are doing well."

"And Tony's OK?" asked Abby.

"He will be fine," assured Ducky, "he has twisted his knee a little but said it was no worse than when he tried to assume the Fish Pose, whatever that is. In fact, from what the helicopter crew were saying, our Anthony did very well in keeping their spirits up. It seems he knew the plots of several movies involving being lost at sea and they all have undertaken to get together for a movie marathon to watch them all. They may all be suffering a bit from exposure and they will need to stay here for a few hours at least for observation. The doctors have done a remarkable job. It reminds me of a …"

"And are we allowed to do any observation?" asked Gibbs drily.

"Oh, of course, I should have said," said Ducky, "yes, do follow me and I will take you to him. He may have fallen asleep by the time we get there, however, he was having difficulty in staying awake. I fear they have all been running on adrenalin for some hours and are beginning to feel the reaction. It is a common occurrence, I once contributed to a paper on the subject …"

"Ducky," implored Abby, "can we go see him. You can tell us about your paper some other time?"

"Certainly," said Ducky grandly, "follow me."

They all crowded round Tony's bed and he sleepily received a number of hugs, handshakes and manly gestures of affection.

"Next time, you're going on the big bad ship, Tim," he said, "I don't care if you get seasick or not. Although you would have hated being on that life raft, you really would have been calling Earl, delivering street pizza, tossing your cookies …"

"Yes, yes, Anthony," said Ducky with an uneasy look at Tim, "we get the drift. Some of us more than others."

"Oops, sorry McQueasy," said Tony, "I'll take it easy," and he giggled.

"Had some painkillers, Tony?" asked Gibbs.

"Only some very mild ones," said Ducky, "I think it is probably weariness as much as medication which is delivering this effect."

Gibbs realised that Celeste hadn't had a chance to say anything yet so he made one of his proclamations,

"OK, let's give Tony a bit of peace and quiet. Let's go. It's all right, Abs, we'll sit outside."

Such was the power of Gibbs' personality that not only the MCRT but Celeste as well began meekly to file out. Gibbs grinned and pushed Celeste back.

"Hi, there," she said as she went back and took him by the hand, "good to see you." She was surprised to see how alert Tony looked and went on, "Tony DiNozzo, were you pretending to be drugged up so that your loyal co-workers, who have been sleepless with worry over you, would have to leave?"

"Yes?" he said a little sheepishly.

"Good job," she said approvingly, "although I seem to remember that you are rather  _interesting_ when you're on painkillers."

"Miss Jones," said Tony in a mock disapproving voice, "I am shocked. Actually, the doctor said he'd give me a prescription."

"I'll make sure it gets filled," said Celeste.

A few minutes later, as Celeste lay on the bed with Tony, he said, "I've got something for you. It should be in my jacket pocket. Could you get it for me?"

Outside in the waiting area the MCRT heard a scream of fear and shock from inside the cubicle. They rushed in, not knowing what to expect. What they did not expect was to see Celeste throwing a dead fish down on to the floor,

"Tony! Did you do that on purpose? You nearly scared me to death, you idiot!"

The MCRT tactfully backed away. They would have Tony's six in many situations but he was on his own with an irate girlfriend.

"It must have got in the pocket when we went into the water," said Tony, "I wish I'd known. I'd have got McGee to put his hand in there. Here, just give me the jacket and I'll go looking. After the trauma of the last couple of days nothing will shock me."

Celeste stared hard at him but decided to acquit him of putting dead marine creatures in his clothes to scare her. She handed him the jacket and he took something out of an inside pocket.

"I was going to give this to you in a more romantic setting," he said, "but being nearly drowned, focuses the mind, so I won't wait. Here."

Celeste took the small box and opened it with hands that were shaking slightly. She opened it to reveal a rather sticky ring pop candy.

"I thought we could choose a real ring together," said Tony hesitantly, "it could be our first real decision together?"

"The first of many?" said Celeste.

"I hope so, Frances."

"Frances?" queried Celeste, "have you gone off Celeste?"

"Never," said Tony, "but I think calling you Frances shows I've moved past just loving you for your admittedly gorgeous body, I don't just love the model. I love the librarian too."

"And I love  _all_ of you too," said Frances, "and yes, I want to make lots of decisions with you in the future. Even if it means being with your  _crazy_  team … you'll never guess what their latest tall story was. They tried to get me to believe you'd had the  _plague_  … the really  _serious_  type according to Abby, not just the usual  _everyday_ type."

"Ah, yes," said Tony, "about that."

NCISNCIS

When the general excitement about the engagement had died down and when Abby had stopped cooing over both the candy ring and the rather elegant sapphire one, Frances cornered Tim.

"Tony tells me you're about to start work on a new Tibbs book," she said.

Tim nodded, he was relieved that inspiration had come back at last.

"So, I thought I'd say this just once. If I read your next novel and find that Agent Tommy's new girlfriend is called Heavenly or Divine and happens to be a librarian or a bookseller … well, just remember that authors should never  _ever_  get on the bad side of a librarian. Bad things can happen. Do you understand me?"

Tim nodded nervously. He went home that night and destroyed the first twenty pages of the new book. Celeste had brought chaos down on him when she wasn't even trying. He couldn't begin to imagine what she could do if she put her mind to it _._

 

 


End file.
